Hell is other people

Yes, please!

Goodbye awkwardness, hello quiet!

Salon offers quiet chair to avoid awkward small talk.  Sonia Haria, The Telegraph, reports that the salon, located in Cardiff, Wales, introduced a ‘quiet chair’ “so clients can get their hair done without feeling the pressure of making small-talk.” The owner of the salon stated that “[s]ome clients worry they aren’t good at chatting, some just don’t want to do it at all and would rather relax with a magazine.”  We understand. This is a brilliant idea. Customers can request the quiet chair when they book their appointment, and if there’s more than one customer who would rather avoid conversation at the same time, “any stylist can be told to keep it quiet.” And then there’s the bit we really like: “Even the music can be turned down at the client’s request.”

It’s a long flight to Cardiff, but a small price to pay for a peaceful haircut.

Link via Hyperacusis Research.

It’s going to be a long summer

You’re finally settled into your new place! And then you learn that your neighbor is a DJ…

New rules limit NYPD’s ability to address noise complaints. Just in time for the summer, New York City police “will no longer be allowed to go onto private property and remove sound equipment when responding to noise complaints.”  The reason, reports the NY Daily News, is that a new directive provides that “’warrantless entry’…is not authorized solely for the purpose of abating noise conditions.” Under the directive, if police are not given permission to enter an address for which a noise complaint has been made, “the officers ‘may return on the following day and issue summonses as appropriate.’”

While we understand–and applaud–the police department’s concern about officers engaging in warrantless entries, providing that officers “may return the following day” (unlikely) to issue a summons seems like a recipe for disaster: take one obnoxious and indifferent neighbor, add in too much noise, stir in a bucket full of frayed nerves, and shake vigorously. If the NYPD wants to stop warrantless entries for noise complaints while maintaining the peace, maybe it’s time to extend night court hours beyond 1:00 a.m. and allow officers to get a timely summons.

 

Because the world isn’t noisy enough, someone created fidget spinners

Photo credit: Charmingco licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0

But no worries, reason prevails: Fidget spinners banned from schools for making too much noise. For the uninitiated, a fidget spinner is a “palm-sized spinner containing ball bearings which can be flicked and spun around.” And why do they exist (other than to torment us)?  Actually, they were designed to help students with ADHD and autism and it’s thought that they help with concentration, but they became “a fad after YouTube bloggers gathered millions of views by performing tricks with them.”  So students who were playing with fidget spinners for fun and not to help them concentrate were interfering with students trying to concentrate.  While the linked story was about a ban at a UK school, you’ll be glad to know that fidget spinners are also banned in 32% of the largest high schools in the U.S. So far.

Time to invest in hearing aid companies

Photo credit: Chris Harte licensed under CC BY 2.0

Why? Because this sort of thing is still being encouraged: Toronto Raptors’ coach “wants more crowd noise at home.” Yes, Coach Dwane Casey asked Raptor fans “to turn up the volume and match the noisy support generated in Milwaukee by the leather-lunged Bucks crowd.” A sentence that has deep meaning for some. As for us, our interpretation is that either the coach really believes that a stadium full of screamers makes a difference or he is disingenuously attempting to engage fans at whatever cost, including their hearing. Whatever the reason the end result is painfully loud noise that will leave a lasting mark on everyone who experiences it.

So follow our lead–skip the game and check this out instead: Top 6 hearing aid manufacturers.

 

What can you do about noisy neighbors?

Photo credit: Denise Cheng licensed under CC BY 2.0

The Derby Telegraph offers some guidance for dealing with the neighbor in love with his leaf blower or outdoor audio system. While some of the suggestions may not translate well–the Derby Telegraph is a UK newspaper–some will. Namely, the first suggestion is dead on, unless, that is, you have reason to know that your neighbor is unstable or obnoxious on purpose:

[T]he first thing you should always do is speak to the person causing the noise. Most of the time they don’t realise they are causing a nuisance and are usually happy to change what they are doing.

If reason does not prevail, the article provides a link to the Derby City Council website and walks the reader through the process of filing a noise complaint online. We have some catching up to do in the U.S., but there are communities with mechanisms to complain about noise, like New York City’s 311 system. But if there isn’t a reasonable way to file a complaint where you live, find out who represents your ward or neighborhood and ask him or her to propose one. There should be a process to address noise and other complaints that comes between constituents seething in impotent rage and calling the cops as a first measure.

And we don’t know about you, but we learned one very interesting fact from this article: Germany has “strict ‘quiet hours’…between 8pm and 7am and all day Sundays and holidays.” Then again, we shouldn’t be surprised, as “Germany’s love of silence led to the first earplug.”

Mallgoers would rather deal with pigeon poop than noise

Photo credit: Fritz Park licensed under CC BY 2.0

Mary Beth Quirk, the Consumerist, reports that “shoppers at one New York mall would rather risk getting hit by bird droppings than listen to the sounds coming out of the complex’s speakers.”  Apparently officials at the Rego Center Mall in Queens, New York City, installed a sound system “that blast[ed] noisy bird calls every 30 seconds or so,” to deal with an infestation of pigeons that were nesting and defecating near one of the mall entrances. But the law of unintended consequences prevailed, as the noise got on many shoppers’ last nerve.  One shopper, who claimed that he had “been pooped on previously at the mall,” said that he preferred “the risk of falling feces to the noise coming out of the mall speakers.”

 

 

Man takes revenge on noisy neighbors

Buy it now at Taobao.com

How?  By buying a ‘building shaker’ and leaving it on all weekend. Shanghaist reports that a Xi’an resident named Zhao was having problems with his upstairs neighbors whose little boy was jumping and running and disturbing his rest. Zhao complained to building management and tried to talk to the neighbors about the problem but to no avail, so he resorted to Plan B: Operation Self-Help. Long and short, Zhao “went online and bought a ‘building shaker’ for 400 yuan [Ed.: about $58], looking to give the noisy neighbors a taste of their own medicine.” He turned the building shaker on one Friday evening and then left his apartment for the weekend.

The article makes it clear that Zhao got his neighbors’ attention. In fact, they complained that the constant thumping was “driving them insane.”  When he returned to his apartment,  police officers asked Zhao to turn the building shaker off. Shanghaist states that it is not known whether Zhao was punished for his “act of revenge.”

While we would not suggest this sort of thing, and certainly not as a first step in addressing a noise complaint, we’re guessing that Zhao’s neighbors were a bit more mindful after that weekend. Just saying.

An interesting look at the cultural response to noise

Photo credit: Julian Mason

In “Living loud in China’s lively public spaces,” , BBC News, writes about noise in China’s bustling cities. McDonnell states that “[t]here is something incredible about the way in which societies, cities, subcultures find their level in terms of acceptable public volume.”  For example, he notes that there are “bustling cities – rammed with millions of people – where you could be frowned upon for disrupting others with a raised voice: Seoul, London, Tokyo… especially Tokyo.” But McDonnell has lived the last 12 years living in China, where, he notes:

There are some societies where people are expected to avoid being noisy in public and they behave accordingly. Then there’s China.

He describes the “cacophony of chaos” he experiences in a cafe, where someone “starts a phone call at the top of their voice,” as two buddies loudly play video games on their phones, and “a young convert to Christianity sits down next to [him] and starts praying” just as a nearby “hippie looking Chinese bloke has booted up his laptop and Coldplay starts belting out of the speakers.”  This experience is not atypical, he writes, and adds that, looking around, “nobody but me has reacted as if this is anything but completely normal.”

Interestingly, he says that there is only one other city where he has seen this phenomenon–New York–where he describes a similar experience in a diner.  McDonell ponders, “[m]aybe you have to speak up in order to be heard amongst a huge population?”  That is, maybe it’s the space and not just the culture that determines the “acceptable public volume?” After all, he asks, “what noise does a Chinese farmer have to compete in the field?”